That Anambra Inauguration ‘gbajue’

Gbajue’ is a Yoruba slang, a metaphor, for con artistry, a criminal act that has now transformed from one-on-one conning of victims by criminal smart alecs, who make outlandish offers within Nigeria, to “yahoo yahoo,” the same business, but carried out online and across continents by young lads operating with laptops and ample data feeds.

Among the most outlandish escapades of local “gbajue” are the sale of non-existent ocean-going ships to unsuspecting victims, referred to as “mugu,” while the “yahoo yahoo’s” victims are called “maga,” foreigners, usually lovelorn caucasian ladies, spinsters and widows, who fall prey and remit a huge amounts of their retirement benefits for false promises of love or even marriage.

Another name for both crimes is “419,” derived from the section of the Nigerian criminal code that deals with fraud, false pretences and forgery. Some, who are conversant with law in other climes, say that the law that deals with these sets of crimes in India are under Section 420.

A Nigerian con artist was so successful in the business that he could invest the proceeds of his escapades in buying substantial shares of a first-generation Nigerian bank where he even became a director. The skyscraper he built is still one of the most impressive buildings on high street Allen Avenue in Ikeja, Lagos.

In recent times, the most significant Nigerian kingpin of con artistry is a certain Abbas Rahman, also known as “Hushpuppi,” a loud, extravagant publicity-hugging Instagram celebrity. His alleged criminal activity was busted in Dubai in 2021 and he is currently cooling his heels in the custody of American law in California, USA.

He is accused of diverting pension payments of American retirees via an elaborate scamming scheme, an eloquent testimonial to a highly sophisticated mind that has perfected deft manipulations of the internet superhighway.

The gentleman is so successful that a few weeks ago another elaborate scam was credited to him, while still in the custody of American law, and practically everyone believed the story. But the Americans came out to debunk the claim.

But “yahoo plus,” the morbid enterprise, is the most dangerous. The simplest way to describe it is “ritual murder” whereby mostly young females are lured by their supposed lovers who turn them into human sacrifices for fortune. You don’t want to know too much about it.

But the “gbajue” that occurred during the inauguration of Governor Charles Soludo is a literal, real, altercation between Mrs. Bianca Odumegwu-Ojukwu, nee Onoh, former beauty queen and former Nigerian ambassador to Spain, and Mrs. Ebelechukwu Obiano, now former First Lady of Anambra State.

In response to an alleged verbal assault, the “slapee,” former First Lady Ebelechukwu received a “dirty slap” as explained by the “slapper,” Mrs. Odimegwu-Ojukwu, who said that she had to take such a drastic and violent action when she perceived a threat to her “gele” or headtie.

As an Igbo matriarch (of the House of Odimegwu-Ojukwu, for that matter), a distinction that she rightly accorded herself, Mrs. Odimegwu-Ojukwu was left with no other choice but to defend her honour and self dignity.

And many seem to agree and endorse her action, though some others, who never mind their business or ever agree that the laws of Nigeria approve of self-defence in the face of an unrelenting and habitual adversary, point out that the slapper did not conduct herself with the decorum of the ambassador (for life) that she is.

Well, Ambassador Bianca, who is also a lawyer, like her dad, former Governor C.C. Onoh of Anambra State, could claim that she was provoked and thus plead self-defence.

Unfortunately, First Lady Ebelechukwu was standing behind a pole which makes it difficult to ascertain if truly she drew the first blood by tapping Ambassador Bianca’s shoulder twice or attempting to remove her gele.

Dim, or Lieutenant Colonel, Emeka Odimegwu-Ojukwu, Ezegburugburu, or universal King of Igboland, was Military Governor of Eastern Nigeria under Major-General J.T.U. “Ironside” Aguiyi-Ironsi, first Nigerian Military Head of State.

Lieutenant Colonel Odimegwu-Ojukwu later headed Biafra, a secessionist Republic, that sought to separate from Nigeria after the pogrom that followed the abduction and killing of General Aguiyi-Ironsi and his host, Colonel Adekunle Fajuyi, Military Governor of Western Nigeria.

Odimegwu-Ojukwu could not accept erstwhile Chief of Army Staff, Lieutenant Colonel Yakubu Gowon, whom Northern Nigerian elements in the military imposed as the new Military Head of State. There was a more senior officer, Babafemi Ogundipe, with the rank of Brigadier General, who could have been Head of State.

Odimegwu-Ojukwu later married Most Beautiful Girl in Nigeria, Bianca Onoh, who took his name, and maybe also his no-nonsense disposition that may have prescribed the dirty slap that she admitted to have administered on First Lady Ebelechukwu.

Despite the fact that the persons involved are VIPs, people still think that the police, who were present at the venue of the slap, should have arrested both the “slapper” and the “slapee” for violent behaviour and causing public disorder in a solemn and august occasion.

But maybe because both are wives of men of “timber and calibre” the police, personnel of Nigeria Security and Civil Defence Corp and of the gum-shoes Directorate of State Service and other security agencies present chose to look away.

There are unconfirmed reports that former First Lady Ebelechukwu used to slap or, at least, verbally assault staff in the executive branch and in the Government House in Awka, Anambra State capital. But no one is willing to swear to the veracity of this allegation.

Some, who claim, on the usually unreliable social media platforms, to be conversant with the doings of the former First Lady, insist that the allegation is true. They add, without an iota of proof, that the former First Lady never failed to impress on everyone in Anambra State that she was the wife of the governor.

They tried to corroborate their claim that she is nearly ungovernable by pointing out that whereas she lived in Government House, where Governor Soludo’s swearing-in was conducted, she arrived the ceremony late, long after her husband, who should have arrived last to any such occasion as the governor.

Rather than behave herself, she choose to walk, with what she many have thought was dainty steps of a model, to the presence of Ambassador Bianca Odimegwu-Ojukwu for a disgraceful finale to her reign as Her Most Worshipful Majesty, the First Lady of Anambra State.

It didn’t help matters that when Ebelechukwu, now shorn of all dignity, was finally returned to her seat beside her husband, she appeared to be scolding him for trying to calm her down.

That action, of rebuffing her embarrassed husband’s entreaties, certainly put off a lot of people, who thought she could at least respect her husband in public. They got so disappointed in her rather unruly conduct.

Some mischievous people are claiming, again without proof, that former First Lady Ebelechukwu grew up in the high-density Ojuelegba area of Lagos and that her conduct is practically that of an “alatika,” the Yoruba equivalent of the uncouth and unsophisticated.

But you have to give it to former Governor Willie Obiano who displayed rare calmness after the wife (or widow) of another man gave his wife a dirty slap in public. Men as sober as Willie Obiano are rare.

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